Shall I jump now or I wait until I am pushed?

What a lovely morning I have just had.

As I said yesterday I would go to Working Links and see what wonderful things they have to offer outcasts like me.

I explained my circumstances, ie on IB but under IB50 review. They said as I am on Incapacity Benefit they can help. I said from previous experience that there is the possibility as I may have to go to a medical soon and I may well end up on JSA. We all like to know the Atos doctors like to reach their targets and get there commission.

In true James Purnell style the receptionist said "we look at what you can do not what you can't". they said they could help me while I am on IB but if I end up on JSA then I am no longer classed as disabled but fit for work, they said that Working Links would not be able to help me but I would have to go to the office upstairs.

This office upstairs is the one that someone has just come through the door slamming it very hardly making me jump and turning me into a nervous wreck, not though that I wasn't a nervous wreck to start off with. How the glass stayed in the door I do not know? I have experienced this effect before at the jobcentre, its no wonder I contact the DEA by email.

It is true what I said before that if the DWP deem you fit for work even if you have a disability then if you end up on JSA your disability doesn't exist anymore.

Working Links said that they could help me for 6 weeks regardless if I sign up now and do I really want to go back to work? I said I would think about it.

I said yes I would love to go to work but I have things which restrict me, you know effects of brain injury. The receptionist said that a consultant/whatever they are called can look at my work history [that's going to be fun] and what type of work I am interested in and even some people have turned hobbies or interests into work. I thought I am not a f***ing imbecile you know.

Just at that moment some council worker walked in off the street and stood virtually next to the receptionist which I found quite intimidating. I gave him my annoyed look and I wanted to ask him if he wanted to listen to every word in my conversation with the receptionist or tell him to p**s off but I left it as I did not feel like my normal jolly self at this juncture.

I was right when I thought it was all a trap. It turns out it is a even bigger trap now than what I first thought.

So where is all this government help to get you back to work? I did not know that it had conditions attached like you have to be on IB.

If you are not on IB but the DWP think you are fit for work even though you are disabled, it looks like you are on your own then.

Shall I jump now or shall I wait until I am pushed?

For the vast majority, ESA “will be a temporary benefit, not a permanent snare”.

James Purnell said "For the vast majority, ESA “will be a temporary benefit, not a permanent snare”.

Right so where does that apply to me then?. That's of course if I can survive the IB50 and possible medical which I am sure I will have to go to.

Allegedly the Employment and Support Allowance is supposed to be a temporary benefit between getting a job, however this is unworkable for lots of disabled people. ie, with a traumatic brain injury the effects that you are left with get better to a point [its called a plateau] but you are left with the damage for the rest of your life and you just have to cope. There isn't a magic fix. A lot of disabled people feel under threat.

I do voluntary work in the idea that I will build myself up so I am well enough to work full-time, this is my dream. However I am never going to get to the levels I was at before my head injury however hard I try.

Voluntary work is good for you if you get in the right place with the right support. It can help you build up your confidence and self-esteem.

I feel sorry for the people who after two years on JSA who will be doing community work to get their benefits. Collecting litter and cleaning graffiti will not be good for their self-esteem as people feel low enough already with being tarred as scroungers and cheats.

Will unemployed/disabled people have to wear orange suits or something else the government sees fit to humiliate them?.

Why can't disabled people get better jobs?. What sort of career can one look forward to?. What sort of earning potential do I have?. It makes me feel depressed looking through the jobs never seeing anything that looks stimulating and the jobs that say that they pay more than minimum wage [That's the £5.52 I was talking about in my first post]

In the town where I live it makes me angry when I see disabled people at work, two in particular, I see this poor girl who doesn't look very happy working in a well known burger chain [the one that does hardly anything for vegetarians, don't get me started] cleaning tables and mopping the floor and cleaning the toilets and all the shit jobs. I have never seen her working behind the counter serving the customers

I want to ask her does she enjoy her job?. What does she feel? Are there any career prospects in cleaning tables and refilling the tomato sauce pots?.

There's this guy who works in a large DIY store who constantly goes round the car park collecting trolleys. I think what sort of career prospects is there in collecting trolleys or does he have to feel grateful that he has a job?

Is this all the jobs that disabled people are worth doing? Perhaps I have just had a sheltered life and don't meet up with all the disabled people working in all the high flying jobs

The place where I worked at for a short time where I ended up filing magazines, the people said to me how you should be grateful that you have a job here, and when I went off for a couple of weeks for some rehabilitation that they would hold my job for me. How reassuring.

Have things changed since 1998?.

From my own experience if given the opportunity, disabled people can be hard working, motivated individuals.

People need to feel valued and not just being pushed into low paid crap jobs just so it makes government figures look good, then it makes you wonder why people like me rely on IB when the jobs out there aren't very attractive and the pay is less than IB.

However James Purnell will soon put that to an end with the introduction of ESA and we can all look forward to harsher medicals [even though they are harsh enough already] and visits to the Jobcentre to sign on for for JSA.

If in the meantime if Labour are voted out, the Conservatives aren't much better either. Our government want you to be poorer even though you haven't got the capacity to be able to work full-time

I am trying to remain positive but its difficult when you feel under threat every day.

Brainblogger