I keep trying to push myself to the point where I feel like I could do a job. One of the biggest problems I have with a brain injury even after 20 years is fatigue. I get home from voluntary work and I am constantly have to fight to stop myself going to sleep as I am physically exhausted.
I have had this problem since day one of the head injury and it's made worse when I try to get back into a work situation. Yesterday I got home, got washed, had a drink, sat down and then the fight begins to not go to sleep. I usually like to have a sit down and then check my email but by this time my brain is already trying to shut me down and make me sleep. It's not like the sort of late in the evening time to go to bed tired, its difficult to describe but its not pleasant.
I often think that having a can of red bull or something like that will help keep me awake but in fact this is actually quite futile. I can have a coffee or a red bull and half hour later I am asleep for anything for 2-4 hours which is quite bizarre. This often happens so it makes the time in the afternoon/early evening a write off.
This also makes a mess of sleep as it is like instead of having a long 7 hour sleep at night I often have 2 sleeps and then I can be awake at 2 am in the morning. Somebody said to me last week that I should try going to the sleep clinic.
What is happening is in my attempt to be well enough to work is the fatigue is then crossing over into my family life. What's the point to all this?. Is this what the politicians want all in the name of getting people to work and saving there precious money?. I am only 1 person who has to manage there condition, what about all the other people who have to manage there condition everyday and then in the future going to be punished for having a disability or condition and then being forced to find work?.
see ya
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